LOL VILLANELLE

[fulselden]

Written (DESPITE MYSELF) for the prompt  'say not soft things' at 31_days.
Series: The Little Mermaid (Disney; postcanon)
Characters: Ariel, the prince.
Rating/Warnings: G. Poetry!fic.

 

Say not soft things, my darling girl, to me

You left your shoes together with your crown,

You open up your mouth within the sea

 

And take salt water like a salary.

Show me your face, girl, that sharp smile or frown

Say not soft things, my darling girl, to me.

Take all my lands and castles as your fee

Take inland water, deep and soft and brown.

Don’t open up your mouth within the sea.

Take string bikinis and a golden key,

Take my assurance, girl, take up your gown,

Say not soft things, my darling girl, to me.

 

You walk a little slowly, girl, for me

But that I’ve never told you, set it down.

You open up your mouth and breathe the sea.

 

I’ll bring you canes all tipped in ivory

I’ll bring you red shoes and take you to town,

Say not soft things, my darling girl, to me.

You open up your mouth within the sea.

Comments

[stultiloquentia]

*blink* I think this is my favourite villanelle ever. They're one of those tricksy, paradoxical forms that are both easy and fucking hard (kinda like playing Mozart). I am damned impressed by your fresh sharpness, and what it does to the Disney flick. That touch of Andersen is perfect.

Take string bikinis and a golden key,
Take my assurance, girl, take up your gown,

Gah.

You walk a little slowly, girl, for me

GAH.

[fulselden]

*double blink* R-really?! Wow, thank you, that means a lot. And, yes, definitely a touch of Andersen!

And really, thank you - The Little Mermaid is I think the only Disney film I saw when I was actually still a kid, and I remember being blown away by it at the time, so I'm glad you think I did it justice.

[fulselden]

... And looking at this again, I think I was insufficiently effusive in my thanks last night! But thank you, really! Maybe seeing The Red Shoes itself on the big screen a while ago helped? So gorgeous, oh (impending) 50s aesthetics.